Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Sorry About Anonymous Posts

So sorry about the advertisements in comments. They do not reflect me!! From now on if someone wants to post a comment you are going to have to register as a blogger. It is very easy and you do not have to create a blog to post.
Please still comment!!

Give me a great song!

This past weekend at Women of Faith we heard some wonderful singing!! Nichole Nordeman and Avalon were there. I love Avalon. Their voices are amazing and I love their song Adonai. But...my true "fan" devotion lies with Nichole Nordeman. She is one of the most talented musicians I have ever heard. Her lyrics of every song go to some deep parts of the heart. Her music is true and meaningful. She writes all of her own music which I love too!
I heard her for the first time when I was 8 months pregnant with Malaya and I was floored and awed by her talent and the way she led the whole crowd to a place of worship. Nichole's music has been my "best friend" through some milestones in my life:
--Her music played a lot during those first few weeks of Malaya's life. It was calming for me and Malaya.
--When Malaya was 3 months old we moved from Abilene to Tulsa, Oklahoma. My heart was so scared and torn driving that drive to Tulsa for the first time. David had bought us an apartment over the internet. I had never seen it. We knew NO ONE. It was very scary. Nichole's music played in the car. Her song about Jesus being crucified was playing and I realized that my fear was insignificant and that God was going to be there for me as He was for His own son.
--Many of you know that David andI have been trying to have another baby for over 4 years now. A year and half into that journey I was seeing a specialist and they did a very expensive procedure that I was just SURE had worked. I had the blood work done that I knew would be positive. I went back to my parents house in Grapevine to await my good news. They called and said that it did not work. I was not pregnant. My mom kept Malaya and the whole way home I played over and over a song called My Offering as I bawled and cried out to the Lord and gave Him my life over and over again. There truly was an angel driving my car that day b/c I have no clue how I made it home. :)
-About a year after that God started teaching me a lot about "church". What it is and is not supposed to be. Of course, another one of Nichole's songs was there.

"Oh, the days when I drew lines around my faith to keep you out, to keep me in, to keep it safe.
Oh the sense of my own self, to say whose wrong, who won't belong, or who can not stay.
Cause, somebody, somewhere decided we'd be better off divided and somehow despite the damage done,

He says come.
There is room enough for all of us.
Please come.
The arms are opened wide enough.
Please come.
This is the heart of the one who stands before and open door and bids us come.

Oh the times when I have failed to recognize, how many chairs are gathered there around the feast.
To break the bread and break these boundaries that have kept us from our only common ground, the invitation to sit down if we will come.

There is room enough for all of us.
Please come.
And the arms are open wide enough.
Please come.
This is the heart of the one, who stands before an open door and bids us come."

I love it.
More Nichole lyrics to come also. Maybe I will do a Nichole "Song of the week".

Her new CD is amazing. If you don't have it, you need it!! Her single Brave has reminded me that with Christ we can have the strength to do and get through anything.

Anybody else have an artist that the Lord has worked through to draw you near to Him during certain times in you life? I would love to hear them.

Monday, August 29, 2005

Sick Kindergartener

Malaya has a stomach bug:( This is her first day to miss school. It's always hard when your child is sick but stomach sicknesses are so hard b/c you are quite limited on things you can do to help. There are only so many crackers and cups of Gatorade ( that only comes right back up) that you can give them. I always give her a wet rag to put on her forehead. But I am not quite sure how much that does for her!! Anyway, please say a little a prayer for Malaya today that she will get well very soon!!

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Search my Heart...

I have been reminded of a verse I used to meditate on every day and I had let the thoughts slip away for way too long. "Search my heart, Oh God, and see if there is ANY offensive way in me." That is so powerful!! There is way too much offensiveness in ole' Jenny Bizaillion's heart. At times I feel God's pruning and searching so deep!! It physically hurts sometimes when God is at His work. I pray I will never be shut down to His healing! May God continue His work in me! ( There is a lot to do!)

We will be going to Women of Faith this weekend. I am going with two of my most favorite people, my mom and sister in law, Jennifer. We will truly miss my other sister in law, Kayci:) But we will think lots about her and wish she was there!! I can't wait to spend that 24 hours with them and share faith stories of the past few months. The Ross' have taken some deep hits this past year (more on this in blogs to come) and yet still God has been victorious through every member of our family. Not one Ross will ever go down in this life without a fight from each member. May the devil never gain one of our souls!!

This will be a great weekend of teaching and refreshment!!

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Battling through prayer!

When David is gone, I put Malaya in bed with me when I go to bed. We love to snuggle but the main reason I do it is because I lay there beside her, I stare at her angelic, beautiful face and I pray over her. I plead before God to help me be the mom that Malaya Bizaillion needs. I pray over different jouneys of her life. I pray for her future friends. I pray for her future husband. I pray for her purity. I pray that she will be a strong, confident woman of God and of His word. I pray for her physical health.
Every once in a while a full a STRONG pull from the Holy Spirit to pray the following prayer and every single time I feel like the Holy Spirit is ripping the words from my heart and mouth because they are so hard to pray: I pray that He (God) will do WHATEVER it takes to make her a true, wholehearted believer. This brings tears to my eyes even typing this because I know from personal experience that many times the only way us stupid humans "get it" and become truly devoted is through pain and devestating experiences. What parent wants their child to experience this-selfishly, NOT ME!! I dread these times as a mom. My heart already aches for these times. BUT--in a deeper part of my heart, I give thanks to Our God who is control of IT ALL and DOES NOT FORSAKE US. He is ALMIGHTY, Alpha and Omega!! AMAZING!!!! And that through those hard, painful times I pray that my flesh, Malaya, will choose her Lord and will choose faithfulness!! I can battle for her through prayer.
My love for Malaya goes so deep!

Thank you Father, for being my foundation. May I teach my daughter to lean on that same rock. Thanks God for letting me be Malaya's mom. May I never forget what you have done for me and what you will do for her!!

Monday, August 22, 2005

Back to Topics of Kindergarten

Well, I found out today that I am "Room Mom" of Malaya's class. I am very excited about this task. Though I have not one creative bone in my body, I can organize! I was told today that, "Organization is the most important thing for a room mom."
Being a Christian mom that has chosen to put my child in public school, I feel it is vitally important for me to be involved and active at her school. I want to be aware what my child is learning, who her friends are, what her environment is, etc. There are so many ways that she can be Jesus to so many kids. I am excited about that opportunity for her. Kindergarten is Malaya's first ministry:)
I am so excited about this year for both of us. Not only is this a whole new world for her but it is also a whole new stage as her mom. The life that David and I thought we would be living right now looks absolutely nothing like we had expected ( more blogs on that to come). So I am stepping into it not quite sure where my feet are going but I am concentrating firmly on the face of God so that I do not get distracted in this time of uncertainity. May God use me and Malaya to bring Him and His joy into people's lives!
What a fun year we have in store for us Biz's!!

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Sad but Grateful Wife!!

David left a few hours ago to head back to Houston to work for the week. I think the Lord has definitely brought us to this part of our journey to remind me how much love I have for this man. I could not even begin to describe the reasons why....He is just amazing and he loves me (those who know me, know I am quite hard to love sometimes:) He has taught me more about life and selflessness, passion and devotion, and about what it means to be a true follower of our Savior.

I pray God brings more business to this area. Please join me in prayer for David's safety and that God will bring our family closer to Him during this part of our journey.

Saturday, August 20, 2005

David and I are just getting back from a long day of Defensive Driving. Yes, we both had to go. What an absolute waste of a Saturday but I suppose that is our punishment for breaking the law. We did our defensive driving at a comedy club so we got to watch the whole movie of Bruce Almighty and got to relearn the basics of driver's ed (including the old animated Goofy movie that surely we have all seen)!! We also got to talk a whole hour about alcohol and drug limits. Did you know that you can be given a DUI for taking Benadryl or Sudafed?? Did you know that a cup of scope is registered as .02 on the breathilizer test??

What a day!

Friday, August 19, 2005

Here is my precious Kindergartener!! Being the champion Flowergirl that she is...This is her at Matt and Courtney Bryan's wedding this summer.
More true blogging to come.

Now an official blogger

After a year of reading and being obsessed with other people's blogs and thoughts and ideas, it is now time to put myself out there and become a blogger myself. We shall see what becomes of this:)